My mother always had good friends from church that were not her age. She had older friends and younger friends. While there was a teacher-student relationship there was also a sense that the field was level, even though there was an age difference. One of our favorites was Mary Thorton Yarborough. She lived down the street. Her husband participated in tractor pulls. And we loved to visit at Christmas and taste all the goodies she had baked.
When Dale and I found our church home, I made lots of friends with ladies older than myself. With each meeting I thought, "Is this MY Mary Thornton?" But soon I realized I didn't need another Mary Thornton, I needed Gaye.
I met Gaye Bryant Kelly in a Bible Study. She was not like many of the other ladies who spent lots of time getting ready for the 90 minutes we spent talking about whatever book study we were doing. She threw on some clothes and walked the two blocks to church. She cut her own hair, wore very little make up and said just what she felt.
Our parents were both from the West side of Charlotte. So Gaye felt we were kindred spirits. There were things we were both raised to believe. Things we gave the West Side credit for. We both grew up in the Methodist Church. We both love to cook and we both love red wine. We both love the mountains. We both love family, even when it is sprinkled with a bit of crazy. Both our families have that bit of sprinkle.
Gaye shared her wisdom with me. She taught me who to share my thoughts with and who would share my thoughts with everyone else. We held each other in confidence. She guided me through IKEA for the first time. She guided me through The Depot (the IKEA of antiques) for the first time. We share food, wine and deals. We both crochet, read and binge the Blacklist. We love our yards, open windows and clothes on the line.
Gaye is a master at capturing the light. She would change the furniture in her shotgun house depending on the season and the light. I have always admired her ability to be still and be aware. I admire her ability to share and her ability to be quiet. She, like me tends to wear her emotions on her face. But she is better than I am at keeping her mouth shut!
We both grew up Methodist. It runs deep for both of us. John Wesley believed small groups sharing God's word were key to understanding it. Gaye and I met in one of those small groups. We evolved into other groups. Sometimes that was a group of four or five cooking pancakes on Ash Wednesday, sometimes it was a group of seven or eight exercising in the Youth Room. And sometimes it was just the two of us and my daughter, eating lunch and shopping for fabric.
With the evolution of technology Gaye and I communicate more via texts than we have in person over the last 18 months. Her husband retired and they bought a mountain house. Even though they did not move completely, time spent here was work time. Two houses, two yards, two gardens. In the end they decided that was too much to maintain in the summer. The house in Concord was under contract in 24 hours.
Tuesday, March 10, 2020
Every School Needs a Jamie
Every school needs a Jamie Hackett. Every kid needs a Jamie Hackett. She is not from Concord but she is the biggest Concord Spiders fan, hands down. Her daughter played volleyball and cheered. He son plays football, basketball and is on the track team. He has wrestled and played baseball too!
Jamie attends every game her children have competed in. And many her children don't compete in! Her daughter has graduated and Kena can usually be found at her brother's games too.
When the athletic boosters were hesitant to take on a fund raiser at the Panther's Stadium Jamie said, "The football team will do it." And they did, well, Jamie and her friend, Leanna did. At every single home Panthers game (and a few other events) Jamie and her volunteers sold burgers and chicken wings raising money for Concord football. If your child played another sport she shared the wealth. When the new baseball coach pitched in, she shared the wealth. It is a 9-5 day with a 45 minute commute. It is a on-your-feet-hustle-and-smile-all-day-on-your-day-off kind of day. That smile never leaves her face. She is happy to be there, she is happy to work for her kids.
And they are all her kids. She has the cell numbers and they have hers. She texts to check on them. She makes sure they have a ride home, a ticket to the game, and food to eat.
She organizes meals for what ever team her kid is on. And when he moves up or on she makes sure that the next person in charge, cares just as much as she does.
She knows the story on each kid. Not so she can gossip, so she can support them. She knows who might need a ride, a sandwich or a hug. She will take a picture and brag on her kid and yours.
Thank you Milton, Kena and Jameson for sharing Jamie with Concord High. Go Spiders!
Jamie attends every game her children have competed in. And many her children don't compete in! Her daughter has graduated and Kena can usually be found at her brother's games too.
When the athletic boosters were hesitant to take on a fund raiser at the Panther's Stadium Jamie said, "The football team will do it." And they did, well, Jamie and her friend, Leanna did. At every single home Panthers game (and a few other events) Jamie and her volunteers sold burgers and chicken wings raising money for Concord football. If your child played another sport she shared the wealth. When the new baseball coach pitched in, she shared the wealth. It is a 9-5 day with a 45 minute commute. It is a on-your-feet-hustle-and-smile-all-day-on-your-day-off kind of day. That smile never leaves her face. She is happy to be there, she is happy to work for her kids.
And they are all her kids. She has the cell numbers and they have hers. She texts to check on them. She makes sure they have a ride home, a ticket to the game, and food to eat.
She organizes meals for what ever team her kid is on. And when he moves up or on she makes sure that the next person in charge, cares just as much as she does.
She knows the story on each kid. Not so she can gossip, so she can support them. She knows who might need a ride, a sandwich or a hug. She will take a picture and brag on her kid and yours.
Thank you Milton, Kena and Jameson for sharing Jamie with Concord High. Go Spiders!
Be That Mom
My mom taught my friends to eat artichokes, kiwi and brussel sprouts.
We made pasta from scratch.
We had a wok and made homemade eggrolls.
She let us make a mess and I don't remember any complaining about cleaning it up.
She taught me to crochet and to sew. We made my prom dresses, all three of them!
She taught me love plants and to share them!
She helped my friends with their science fair projects, she was a science teacher.
Be that mom for your children and their friends. Make a mess with them in the kitchen and eat what you created! Buy something new and find a way to cook it.
Play with your kids, kick the soccer ball, throw the baseball, run a race, get in the water with them. They may be faster, score on you or hit you with the ball. But they will see that aren't afraid to get wet, dirty and sweaty. They will see loosing isn't always bad (they may loose, or you may!) And you will both enjoy time together.
Find a DIY project and give it a whirl. The laughs and time you spend together will mean more than any video game you buy them.
Plant something in the yard. Water it, watch it grow, watch it bloom. You will be outside in the fresh air giving back to the earth.
And be that mom, go to the movies with them, bake cookies, plant something. Be that mom that gives them space. But be that mom that welcomes them. Be that mom with the house that the kids want to come to. Be that mom that has to park in a different place because there are kids at her house. Be that mom. They will be safe, you will know where they are and I promise they won't forget. I haven't.
We made pasta from scratch.
We had a wok and made homemade eggrolls.
She let us make a mess and I don't remember any complaining about cleaning it up.
She taught me to crochet and to sew. We made my prom dresses, all three of them!
She taught me love plants and to share them!
She helped my friends with their science fair projects, she was a science teacher.
Be that mom for your children and their friends. Make a mess with them in the kitchen and eat what you created! Buy something new and find a way to cook it.
Play with your kids, kick the soccer ball, throw the baseball, run a race, get in the water with them. They may be faster, score on you or hit you with the ball. But they will see that aren't afraid to get wet, dirty and sweaty. They will see loosing isn't always bad (they may loose, or you may!) And you will both enjoy time together.
Find a DIY project and give it a whirl. The laughs and time you spend together will mean more than any video game you buy them.
Plant something in the yard. Water it, watch it grow, watch it bloom. You will be outside in the fresh air giving back to the earth.
And be that mom, go to the movies with them, bake cookies, plant something. Be that mom that gives them space. But be that mom that welcomes them. Be that mom with the house that the kids want to come to. Be that mom that has to park in a different place because there are kids at her house. Be that mom. They will be safe, you will know where they are and I promise they won't forget. I haven't.
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