Lunch at My Desk

This is my lunch.  I was supposed to eat at school with my son who is taking his first EOG test today.  When I got there, three and a half hours after testing started he wasn't finished.  He does get to eat his lunch but he doesn't get to eat with me.  He doesn't get to eat with the kids who have finished the test.  He gave his smart watch to his teacher.  He took the Road ID off his shoe for fear of it making noise and causing a misadministration.  (A Road ID is simply an identification tag he wears on his shoe when he runs.)  I don't know where he is eating, because I couldn't see him.

As his sweet teacher told me what was going on, I cried.  I cried in front of all his friends.  I tried to stop but I just couldn't.  My teacher friend came over and hugged me, I cried some more.  I cried because I had promised him I would eat lunch with him when he was finished.  I cried because I kept my promise and he didn't even know it.

After three hours, these kids are eating lunch an hour after they usually do.  They are fried, and mine has to keep going.  Why is a 9 year-old taking a three hour test?  And he has to take another one on Thursday!

He isn't finished because he isn't smart.  This kid has grown seven reading levels this year.  He is smart!  But he questions things.  He wonders how things work and why do you think that.  He plays 'What if' and 'Would You Rather' all the time.  So I am sure he has read and reread the questions and over analyzed them for fear of making a mistake.  Because in his creative brain there may be several ways the question could be answered.

My heart breaks for these kids.  This testing is so unnecessary.  It isn't a true test of what they know.  It isn't a true test of his school.  I am not mad at his teacher or the school or anyone in that school.  They are simply doing what they have been told to do.  And if they don't do it this way, everyone has to do it all over again.

A nine year old and a three hour test.  Who thought that was a good idea?

Bright Lights and Confirmands

My grandfather loved Post-It notes.  They were all over the house.  Most of them were reminders to my grandmother of things he wanted her to do.  I think this was written on one of those Post-It's.  "I have no greater joy than to hear that my children walk in truth." 3 John 4.  After my grandfather died, my mother took that Post-It in his handwriting and had it copied and framed with one of his ties for each of her siblings.  

I have always loved that scripture.  It speaks so well of what my grandfather wanted of his children.  Reflecting on that piece of scripture, I think, that is all I want for my children.

Sunday was Youth Sunday at church.  Eight seniors will graduate.  I have known most of those seniors since they were in elementary school.  Their mothers are my friends.  I remember them romping on the hill at my house during barn parties.  Lost legos and water gun fights.  Yesterday, they led us in prayer, they spoke to us from the pulpit.  I cried with those mommas, because I love those kids too.

Nine 6th and 7th graders were confirmed.  Our daughter was one of the four girls.  She spent most Sunday mornings of the past year leaving her sleep overs early to go to confirmation class.  There were retreats and fun Saturday afternoons with her mentor.  She claims Fran as hers.  I can tell they will be friends for the rest of their lives.  And I am so thankful for that relationship.  I have always cherished my mom's friends that were my friends as well. 

Blakely learned more about the kids in her class.  They have matured and grown as friends.  They have grown deeper in their faith.  The four girls in this group will always be friends. The girls have been in church together for most of their lives.  They all go to different schools but church is what they share.  That is special, not everyone has a church family.  While the boys are still icky boys, she does respect them.  

Thank you Rebecca Tucker and Daren Brauer for leading these kids.  I can't put into words how much we appreciate your dedication to the faith journey of some silly middle schoolers.  I noticed yesterday how excited they were to be confirmed.  They did this with your help, but they owned their accomplishment and they were proud.  

And to my mom.  It was so sweet to sit beside and you sing Methodist hymns I know because of you.  Rebecca thanked the parents for making the dedication to get their children to church to participate in Youth and confirmation.  I need to thank my mother.  When I was in middle school she let me make the decision about my faith.  It took me longer, because I was a bit of a rebel.  I didn't want someone to tell me how to love God.  I eventually saw that love is love.  You aren't taught how to love God, you are taught how to love and respect people.  And that is loving God.  

My Child and Middle School Sports

I love our schools.  Our system has magnet schools both IB and STEM.  But my kids go to their neighborhood schools.  All three of their schools have become IB schools.  I love the curriculum at the Elementary and Middle School level.  As my oldest enters high school next year, he is just doing high school.  And I could go on with all my thoughts on that, but that is a different blog.

We are Concord!  We are Concord Middle School.  One third of our school is each black, hispanic and white.  We are diverse in our economic back ground, our talents and our weaknesses.  My kids have friends of every race in the school.  They know no color.

My oldest has played football and baseball in his 7th and 8th grade years with the same coach for all four.  In the 8th grade he made the basketball team.  Our losses were more than our wins on the scoreboards but not in the eyes of my kid.  At other schools he may not have made the team.  If he had, he may not have played.  In 7th grade baseball and basketball he sat the bench more than he played.  But he watched and he listened and he learned.  He had great coaches who loved these kids.  These coaches gave him opportunities to be a better player.  He played more positions in football and learned to keep fighting even after he had stopped his player.  He stepped up and played center when the center was hurt.  In baseball he learned to pitch in the 8th grade!  Due to injuries we were down pitchers.  David stepped up and said, "I'll try.''

That day there was a track meet, a volleyball game and a baseball game.  Lots of people I knew were at the school.  I was talking with a friend in front of the field house, not watching much of the game.  I looked up at the field and David was on the pitching mound.  I grabbed my friend's arm and said, "Holy s***, David is pitching!"  I grabbed the camera and sat with two of David's friends who play for the high school.  They assured me he was doing well.  I am still a wreck every time he gets on that mound.

After a tough away game, David texted me from the bus and asked if he could stay another minute and ask the coach a question. I was worried he was going to ask if he could stop pitching.  As much as it rattles my nerves, I know it is making him a better player.  Nope, he wanted to make sure he had made the adjustment in his last pitch the way the coach had asked him to.

At the end of every baseball game the coach reminds them to, "Keep it classy."  And they do.

We have seen teammates on winning teams not support each other, not shake hands or say good job.  That is on their coach.  Our last football game the coach and two players on the opposing team were suspended from that game for fighting.  A coach was suspended for fighting.  That boggles my mind.  Yet, said coach was at the game in a coat and hat, calling plays from the other side of the field.  We won that game in the last 7 seconds.

We had baseball players on the football team and football players on the baseball team.  Some kids play both but for some the other sport was a first.  Or the first in a long time.  These kids shared bats and gloves and tips.  They listened as the other vented over difficult practices.  Then they helped each other up and kept playing.

My take from the last two years is I would rather have my kid play on a loosing team than ride the bench on a winning team.  I would rather have my kid play for a coach with his health and character in mind instead of a win.  The best part of all of this is the group of boys that my son has spent his spare time with.  They practice together, play games together, lift each other up and cheer each other on.  They are such good kids, I am excited to see where they go and what they do.

I know I will leave someone out but I am going to try and thank you all.
Coach Webb, Coach Tierney, Coach Black, Coach Treadaway, Coach Blue, Coach Tick, Coach Twiggle, Mr. Hoover and Mr. Walters, Dr. Tulbert and Dr. Snyder.

And the boys; Nick and David played football, basketball and baseball together.  The football players Daniel, Jason, Bryson, Greyson and Tyler.  The basketball players; Nick, Jonathan, Drake and Cam.  And then the baseball team.  I can say they are my favorite because I know them best.  You are closest to them at a game.  You hear the coach fuss and cheer for them.  You can see their faces when they are disappointed. You can catch a smile as they smack the ball or make an out.  And you learn all their mannerisms, like kissing the ball before you hand it to the pitcher at the beginning of an inning.  And how they twirl their bat before they hit.  To these boys; David, Jason, Nick, Matthias(Sticks), Luca, Logan, Tyler, JD, Ben, Greyson, Max (Spanky), Bryson and Jaden, keep playing, I will keep watching (and taking pictures.)

Run for YOUR Life

I have run off and on for almost 20 years.   At my fastest I ran a 5k in 29:22 and a half marathon in 2:22 about a month later.  I may never be that fast or fit again.  And I am okay with that.  Today I ran 4 miles with my dog at a 13 minute pace.  Yep, that is slow as a turtle in peanut butter.  But my face is red, I can taste the salt on my upper lip and my dog is tired.  I earned my glass of wine tonight!

My weight has yo-yo'ed all my life.  I have never really felt comfortable with the way I look.  But I am learning to except it and do what I can to make it healthier.  I am also doing everything in my power to create confident, beautiful children.  My oldest son has vowed not to drink sodas while he plays a sport (all on his own, it has nothing to do with me).  This year he played three sports and he will swim this summer.  My daughter likes to participate in the swim practice for the kids in the older age group so she can be faster.  Her favorite snack is a tangerine.  And my youngest loves to see if he can get more steps in than I do!  He is the youngest and one of the fastest in our running club at school.

I belong to a few running groups on Facebook.  I had to turn off the notifications for one.  "Oh, this run was so hard" and the stats show 9 minute miles.  That was discouraging me from sharing my slower runs.  And it wasn't motivating me to try harder.  And the person that posts the same lament in all three of the groups we are in together.  I don't want to read it three times.  Do you need that much encouragement?

For Lent I gave up sugar and wine during the week.  I do love a glass of wine.  But it is empty calories and I was rewarding my tough day with a glass when I had simply been at my desk or in the car all day.  I love dessert.  But again, I was eating a cookie after lunch AND dinner.  I ate all the Samoas by myself.  I did not share a one with my daughter.  (She loves coconut too!)  I did not eat the entire box at once but I sure did eat two after lunch and two after dinner each day until they were gone!  I realized I was rewarding myself for nothing.  In the end it wasn't a reward, my clothes didn't fit and I felt gross. 

The husband of a friend of mine died this week.  He was 63 and extremely overweight.  He had just come home from the hospital and his bariatric hospital bed was in the living room.  Had he lived that would have been his life.  His wife waiting on him, while he was in a bed in the living room.  Now that is something to lament about.

Who cares how fast you run or how much weight you can lift?  I don't!  Walk when you can, take a yoga class when you can, run if you are able.  Take the stairs instead of the elevator.  Don't grab the closest parking space.  Get up and walk to ask that question, don't send an email across the hall!  Find a workout on YouTube, they are fun, no one will see you and you can do it in your pajamas! 
May we all get red in the face and sweat enough to earn that glass of wine or that slice of cake.  Let us all learn to reward the physical sacrifices instead of the emotional ones and we will all be much healthier.